Jackass of the Day

Today was a great day. Lots of good things coming at once. Isn't it funny how that happens in life? I'm sure everyone has experienced that, when things in life are bad they usually happen all at once or when things are great, same thing.

It's like the universe draws in clusters of good and bad. Hopefully I'm not the only one that feels this way haha. But the phrase "when it rains it pours" comes to mind on days like these.

I woke up and just had good feelings brewing. I interviewed for a character animation position and that went extremely well. As I left the studio and merged into some heavy traffic on a very busy street. I was about to cross a bridge heading back home when all of a sudden cars were screeching to a halt and swerving. A little jam-up and people were going bananas honking because they were not moving through the green traffic light. Then it turned yellow and everyone just drove on through.

I didn't have a care in the world and I was in no rush, as I pulled up to the light I saw the cause of the traffic jam and angry people, a stuck jeep cherokee. Now most of the time I will pull over to help someone, this particular spot was not safe. I figured what the hell and pulled in the other lane and backed up.

As I got out of the car, the light turned green again and the sound of angry honks filled the air. I started to direct vehicles to go around and I found out the people stuck were out of gas. They asked me to help push them. I'm thinking "uhhh I dunno" but I figure what the hell ha.

There was a pregnant and very upset mother in the passenger seat, her daughter was behind the wheel and a 10 year old girl in the back. All about to have a nervous breakdown, granted all the horns were not helping. They were stalled on the far right of 3 turn lanes - two middle lanes to their right directed traffic over the bridge and another lane to the right was a turning lane. And that turning lane went up a very steep inclined hill. And that's where they wanted to go.

There were really no options, the intersection was huge, and to get them out in the middle would be dumb, so the only feasible option was to push them up the hill. I told them I'll go park and I'll be right back. I run the red light cutting across traffic and drive up the hill and pull in a Chili's parking lot. Outside were two employees clearly enjoying their shift being over. I approach them asking if they would care to assist me and they reply, "ARE YOU CRAZY".

Not ready to leave the shaded tree they tell me their boss has a gas can in the back of his car and to go inside and speak with him. "Great, thanks I say" just as I turn their boss comes out and drives over to us. They ask him if he has his extra gas can and he's like "YUP" - I'm thinking holy crap how ironic is all of this. He scavenges through his dirty trunk only to come up empty handed. Then he proceeds to tell me they keep a extra can out back near the dumpster - I'm thinking, sweet, even better! - He looks, and again nothing. Then he goes in to ask the rest of the staff. Nothing.

I say thanks, and decide I'll just push the damn thing myself. As I'm running back down the hill I notice a gas can in the back of a green truck in the parking lot. Hmm. I disregard it and make it back down the hill. I start directing traffic and ask the driver to turn the wheel. Just as I'm doing that the mother tells me not to worry her boyfriend is on his way! GREAT!

SCREEEECH! I turn around and this guy get's out angry as hell slamming his door. I go to say hi and he blows past me cursing up and down.
- B/f - "I guess I'm the only f**kin' person nice enough to help them out!"
- Me - er, okay.
He takes the gas can and throws it against the driver side door, it falls to the ground startling the girls. The mother yells, and get's out. She says thank you and kind of shoos me on my way. Before I leave I ask the "b/f" if he has a hose for the gas can because it doesn't have a spout.
- B/f - "@#$%" "%**@#$"
- Me - okay bye!

As I make it back to my car I see the two girls sprinting towards me. They ask if I can come help them get the gas into the tank because their mom's "b/f" just left them.
- Me - Wow, nice guy.
- 10 yr old - No, not really, I hate him.
Older Sister looks back scolding but agreeing eyes. I laugh and let them know I was being sarcastic. I go up to the tree boys again and ask them about that gas can. I find out it's an employees. I try to make it clear that I borrow it and if they can let the person inside know.
- Me - Mind if I borrow that?
- Dude 1 - You gonna bring it back?
- Me - Well ya (duh lol)
- Dude 2 - just bring it back when your done man

So I run back down the hill gas tank in hand along with the girls and as we make it the sidewalk, their mom has been pouring the gasoline all over the side of their car. I believe she had a hand or finger inside the tank to open the little door but there was gasoline all over the car, the tire, probably her and the street. She looks at us, "I GOT IT!" Opens the passenger door and hurls the empty can inside. I tell the girls I will stay put until I see them drive off....

The girls make it back to the car, engine starts, and they drive off. I take the gas can back up to the truck and a dude runs out from Chili's looking hostile. I try to calm him down as quickly as possible and show him I never planned on stealing his gas tank and walk with him back to his truck placing the can in it's original spot.

- WHEW! That lil' story took a bit longer than I thought to write, but if those little girls ever end up stumbling across this some day. I just want to say - Don't ever date a jackass like your mom.

ps. big thank you for all the effort and help the tree boys put forth.